From sharing domestic responsibilities to figuring out how to discipline your child, these familial stressors can threaten the wellbeing of your relationship and even impact the kids.
Parenting styles are a product of a person’s upbringing and so, it is normal for couples to disagree on some parenting decisions.
Here are some of the best ways to overcome these arguments:
Back-up your partner in front of the kids when small disagreements occur.
Showing your kids that you and your partner are not a unified team can undermine your authority. When this occurs, your child may think they can ‘get around’ any parenting decision you make.
Create rules together.
You and your partner should agree on specific rules, such as bedtime and when the kids can use electronics, and write them down. Show these rules to your kids and be open to any suggestions so that everyone can agree on the house rules.
Determine consequences together.
This is a common area of conflict for many couples as some parents are relaxed about discipline, preferring to talk to the children about mistakes, while other parents feel punishing the children, such as taking away electronics, is the best way to discipline. As a result, it is important to compromise and make a list of agreed-upon consequences.
Give second chances.
Every parent makes mistakes or makes a bad decision with the children now and then. When your partner screws up, don’t start hurling accusations. Wait until the children are not present, and talk calmly about the situation.
Who feels more strongly about the issue at hand?
If you and your spouse are on different pages on something and a compromise can’t be made, the parent who feels more passionately about the issue might make the call.
Take the time to listen.
It helps couples to give each other a few minutes to discuss why a certain issue is important. If we can spend a few minutes hearing the other person’s perspective without our anxiety getting stirred up, and without trying to convince our partner into our way of doing things, defending or blaming, it is probable that you’ll be able to find common ground.